Do you accept that we will all end up dead?
It is going to be five years. I met with some friends to have dinner on Saturday. Among them there was Jordi. A 25 years old guy with whom I had met a few time
Jordi was a happy guy who always saw things in a positive way and had a lot of confidence. It was a pleasure to talk with him.
Even knowing him a little we connected extremely well. We had the same sense of humor, and we made the same kind of jokes. After laughing non-stop during the dinner, we agreed to meet again soon:
– Hey Jordi. –I told him –Next week we should meet again.
– Sure. I don’t remember the last time I laughed so much.
That was the last time I saw him. Two days later a friend of mine called me. He told me that after that dinner, while Jordi was going back home he had a car accident and he died in the act.
That let me in a mental state that I wasn’t ready for. At the beginning, I didn’t think it was going to affect me too much. Jordi and I connected very well, but we were not close friends.
Sadly, I was totally wrong. Without realized it, that experience was in my head 24 hours. At that moment I didn’t understand why. Now I know.
Denial
First, there is the typical reaction in this cases. Denial. You are not willing to face reality. Even at some point, I thought I was going to meet him again the coming weekend.
But you know what?
This only makes you take longer to overcome the situation.
Rage
Later comes anger against anything that could be related to the accident. The car, the conditions of the road or whatever it was.
Finally, it comes to the acceptance. When you don’t have a choice but to face the reality that you will not see him again or laugh together.
We also had to accept the fact that we are here temporally. Today we are here, tomorrow maybe not.
There was something that really shocked me. It was that a young person like him, positive and full of life, could disappear in a heartbeat. I couldn’t even say goodbye.
Fuck. We said “see you the next week” not “goodbye“.
And then you ask:
Why?
The eternal question. When you get tired of asking why you always arrive at the same conclusion. There is not a why.
Life is a gift with an expiration date. A date that we don’t know. And maybe it is better this way.
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